How Many Times Do I Have To Tell You?

Dear K,

I write letters about you, but to you. My letters are little poems and movies. They're like tiny little songs about you and the things I think about between the things that fill the empty stretches of our lives. My letters are miniature portraits painted in words. But they will never be novels. I can't write novels, even though I keep telling everyone I'm trying. I mean I am. But not fully. I don't have a the time or energy to become that machine right now. I mean I want to. I want nothing more than to quit my job and spend eight hours in the cafe downstairs writing a thousand pages of misogynistic bullshit. But I'm not that machine right now.

My life's been a movie since I saw The Royal Tennenbaums in the ninth grade.

Tell you what I'll be Chaz and you can be Margot.

Come on. You know you're a muse.

Get out of your head,
K